Murphy’s Laws of The Long Dark

[conanjaguar]

If it can go wrong, it will go wrong. Let’s see how that applies to TLD.

1. If you eat sardines, you WILL get food poisoning.

2. If you have gone between the Spence Homestead and the Poachers Camp twenty times, on the twenty-first time you will get lost and exhausted, and then fall through thin ice. Five times,

3. If you absolutely MUST get that fire started, every attempt will fail. The next time having a fire actually start would be the worst possible thing that could happen, the fire will start with no problems.

What else can we think of?

[Sito]

Shooting at a bear from the porch while crouched, panic when he charges and you absolutely will forget to uncrouch while franticly trying to get to the door in time.

[conanjaguar]

4 minutes ago, Sito said:

Shooting at a bear from the porch while crouched, panic when he charges and you absolutely will forget to uncrouch while franticly trying to get to the door in time.

How true. I guess you just did that recently, eh?

[Catlover]

Whenever you try and get something done in Pleasant Valley, the weather WILL turn into a blizzard/heavy fog. Yet if you have a day planned for cooking meat or repairing clothes, there won’t be a cloud in the sky

[conanjaguar]

@Catlover

I’m having similar weather over here in the ‘Keg.

Edited July 19, 2022 by conanjaguar

[Sito]

21 hours ago, conanjaguar said:

How true. I guess you just did that recently, eh?

Yeah. I dropped the rifle during the mauling and it disappeared under the porch. More Murphy's.

[conanjaguar]

@Sito

Ouch.

7. One day away from a single run lasting 500 days, your hard disc will crash.

8. If you light a torch, the wind will blow. If you don’t light it, it will be a cold, foggy  day. You just can’t win.

9. When you must find a rifle, a bug will prevent it from spawning. The rifle will spawn after you leave the area, never to return.

10. If you see Timberwolves, look behind you.

[hozz1235]

When you really need something, all containers are empty - opposite true.

[conanjaguar]

11. Whenever you really need/want to find a moose, it will not show up. The moose will spawn at the exact instant that you use up the last of your ammunition.

[SpanishMoss]

When you're walking down a path to get something with the wind in your face, the second you turn around to go back, the wind will rotate and be at your face again

[Leeanda]

2 hours ago, SpanishMoss said:

When you're walking down a path to get something with the wind in your face, the second you turn around to go back, the wind will rotate and be at your face again

That is so true.. drives me nuts!

[conanjaguar]

12. When using the revolver, if you don’t aim at the wolf, you won’t hit it. If you aim at the wolf, it will charge, you won’t hit it, and you will take a lot of damage. Better to use a torch.

[conanjaguar]

13. When you enter Pleasant Valley, there WILL be a blizzard.When you leave, there won’t be a cloud in the sky.

14. If you see Bruno, then Rufus is right behind you.

Edited July 21, 2022 by conanjaguar

[Leeanda]

When you desperately need to mend your clothes you find you haven't got any hides  laying around,even though you've been harvesting for months.

[conanjaguar]

@Leeanda

Another one of your famous bugs?

[Leeanda]

Just now, conanjaguar said:

@Leeanda

Another one of your famous bugs?

Sadly no..  🙂.    So... It's just me then?😁

[conanjaguar]

3 minutes ago, Leeanda said:

Sadly no..  🙂.    So... It's just me then?😁

Not everyone has a hoarding problem. I leave that to the hardest of the hardcore ‘Loperists (no offense, @Drifter Man) and kleptomaniacs (again, no offense meant to anyone).

I personally just tend to shoot whatever gets in my way, so, on a good run, there is never a shortage of wolf pelts... especially at Paradise Meadows!

[Leeanda]

It's hard not to hoard on pilgrim🙂.  I don't kill unnecessarily, except occasionally bears. But I still get enough to make sure I have enough for repairs.. or should anyway!   

As for pv farm, this is the first time in all my runs that I've actually seen many there. I usually get one or maybe two if I'm lucky. I somehow had 4 the other day. Whether it's been one of my weird bugs or just luck I don't know.  I still only killed one of them though.  

 

Edited July 21, 2022 by Leeanda

[conanjaguar]

@Leeanda

I was referring to Paradise Meadows in Milton, the home of Bruno and Rufus, but I gather that the PV farmstead is pretty wolf infested as well.

[Leeanda]

Just now, conanjaguar said:

@Leeanda

I was referring to Paradise Meadows in Milton, the home of Bruno and Rufus, but I gather that the PV farmstead is pretty wolf infested as well.

Sorry..  lack of sleep due to very hot weather has fried my brain..   

Pv farm should have loads of wolves as should paradise meadows. I'm sure there are on stalker though. Not on my runs..

[conanjaguar]

1 minute ago, Leeanda said:

 

Pv farm should have loads of wolves as should paradise meadows. I'm sure there are on stalker though.

Of course they are at Paradise Meadows. Remember the bane of both Gawain and Mordred, and the killers of Percival?

Bringing us back on topic:

17. When you are going up to a cliff to capture a beautiful screenshot, you WILL forget to turn off auto walk... which is why I don’t use it.

[Drifter Man]

On 7/22/2022 at 5:54 AM, conanjaguar said:

Loperists (no offense, @Drifter Man)

None taken  Besides, I'm no true interlopist anymore.

[Carbon]

I don't know Murphy, but Raph's laws decree that:

~ No matter which direction you travel, the wind will be at your face.

~ The last piece of cloth will have you fail at a mend.

~ The blizzard will always arrive as you are ready to walk out the door.

😅

[Guest jeffpeng]

I much like the interpretation that Murphy's Law actually means that whatever can happen will happen. While this also includes that everything "bad" that can happen eventually will happen, it also means that all sorts of miracles will be bestowed upon us if they are even remotely possible.

One of such miracles is my profile picture. I shot a bow from Trapper's door all the way across to the Moose being near the barn - and scored a perfect kill with probably the most accurate shot I've ever taken.

So remember: for every time you curse Cpt. Edward A. Murphy for bringing the most improbable mishaps right to your doorstep you should also bless him for all the miracles you probably falsely attributed to God or your spiritual entity of choice.

Really.... it's all Edward.

Edited July 23, 2022 by jeffpeng

[conanjaguar]

1 hour ago, jeffpeng said:

I much like the interpretation that Murphy's Law actually means that whatever can happen will happen. While this also includes that everything "bad" that can happen eventually will happen, it also means that all sorts of miracles will be bestowed upon us if they are even remotely possible.

One of such miracles is my profile picture. I shot a bow from Trapper's door all the way across to the Moose being near the barn - and scored a perfect kill with probably the most accurate shot I've ever taken.

So remember: for every time you curse Cpt. Edward A. Murphy for bringing the most improbable mishaps right to your doorstep you should also bless him for all the miracles you probably falsely attributed to God or your spiritual entity of choice.

Really.... it's all Edward.

That’s an interesting bit of trivia I didn’t know. I always curse him for sudden gusts of wind or blizzards, but maybe I should bless him for finding matches? If I ever do find matches, that is...