Coronavirus 2020 & Self Isolation

[Guest kristaok]

I hope everyone on the Forums (including Hinterland) are doing well...  and I wish the same for the rest of the World... but I know sadly that isn't the case as many have already lost their lives... may they RIP.

I am making this Topic to just touch base on how all of this is affecting me. 

Ever since all of this started I have been on edge, it wasn't so bad in the beginning, but now it's gotten to where I am getting Cabin Fever, Anxiety Attacks, and Vertigo. The Psychological affects of all of this on me isn't easy to deal with, I kind of need an outlet... but at the same time, I'm still alive and I'm not sick so I feel guilty for complaining.

I think this issue is helping me grow as a person, or at least I hope it does. The World and the things I have dealt with in my life, things done to me by people who were not kind to me have hardened me to an extent, but seeing this on a massive scale is softening me if that makes sense.

I just have to say it... I'm scared for our future... I'm not only scared for myself and others, but mostly for our future generation. 

The loneliness of self isolation REALLY sucks, I mean I have always been sort of a hermit, but this has made me feel even more isolated. Due to being born with Asthma I can't risk catching this Virus or it could potentially kill me. I can't even go out and just see humanity... I just want to smile at someone, wave at them, say HELLO... but I can't... 

I already told my little family here... if I catch this Virus somehow I WILL live in a tent away from the house, I made them promise to not come near me. Of course I want to live and my life would matter in that situation, but I would rather die alone in a tent than to have them catch it and risk their lives too. Hopefully it never comes to that because that would REALLY suck. 

[Aurimas]

Hang in there buddy, just be careful and I hope you're not in Italy

[Guest kristaok]

Thank you. I'm in America, but sadly I heard Italy has it REALLY bad. Prayers for those there and in the rest of the World.

[Guest kristaok]

Update: Been sleeping a lot, I don't know if it's depression or what... I've just been warn out, and it sucks. Even the Games I used to play don't quite satisfy me anymore. 

[Hotzn]

Cheer up, man. It's important to see the positive side of things...

1. Consider how blessed you are that you HAVE a family. There are people out here who have always wanted to have kids, but somehow it didn't happen. Like me.
2. Think about how you would feel if Covid-19 was deadly for kids. Luckily, it's not - for all we know kids are hardly affected.
3. From earlier posts you made I assume you are in a safe place and have enough food in storage. That sets you apart from a lot of other people in the world. You should feel lucky, as I imagine there is hardly anything so bad as if your family is going hungry and you can't provide for them.

And a short story, maybe it makes you happy:

Yesterday, I found a bumble bee in the staircase of the house where I live (we share the house with 2 other families). It was completely exhausted and covered in dust, and probably close to dying. I was on my way to work, but decided I had to attend to the bumble bee first. Picking it up carefully, I carried it back to our flat. First, I tried to put it onto some flowers on our balcony, but it wouldn't move from my hand. Too exhausted. Then, I tried to feed it some honey (acquired from a friend who is a beekeeper). And it worked! It was too cute - the bumble bee was licking the honey off my finger, I could even see & feel its tiny tongue. Very slowly at first, but as it gained strength, it got quicker and quicker. After picking up some honey and water this way, the little fella climbed into my hand, apparently to warm up. After about 10 minutes, it re-emerged and started cleaning itself with great care. Deftly, it wiped off all the dust and curled it into a little ball, which it kicked away with his hind legs. Really cool, it looked brand-new afterwards. And then it started pumping its abdomen and lifted off - over to the flowers where it started collecting nectar from them immediately. Saved. All this too about 45 minutes.

I arrived at work late, but I am my own boss, so nobody cares. It was well worth the time to have saved the little bumble bee.  

[MarrowStone]

It sounds like depression. You're living in fear and anxiety from a serious threat along with the added isolation and a lack of routine from social distancing. Don't feel guilty for feeling the way you do, it is totally valid. Don't feel guilty for craving human interaction when you identify as a "Hermit" You are a human and our love of solitude only goes so far. After all, you often visit this COMMUNITY.

I've battled depression almost all my life and a few things make me feel better:

Don't nap! I know you really want to but keep your sleep schedule consistent. having a non 24 hour sleep cycle will only make your feelings of vertigo and desynchronacy worse. It also wont do favours to your immune system. 

Go outside. Do not stay indoors all day, your yard is perfectly safe from the virus. UV light kills microbes and youll get mood boosting vitamin D. I recommend at least an hour total, especially mornings and sunsets. Go out there with a portable speaker and play some nice songs as you enjoy a tea or a book. Don't use this time to look up news or browse social media!!!!!  This is special time only for you and your family/pets if you let them join. reconnect with the "Now" to escape from the "What ifs". 

Do something productive every day, Something as little as a chore will help you feel accomplished and actually will release feel good chemicals when you're done. 

Pick up an art: Doodle something, learn an instrument.

And lastly, treat yourself occasionally. Do what you can to add a bit of "Normalcy" back into your life for a moment. It may not be an efficient way to survive, but if you lose your will to carry on with life, your stash you've been rationing wont last you any longer. 

If you take care of it now you wont have to get a therapist to deal with the mental scarring (which i guarantee will be in very high demand once this is all over, you are not alone, people are losing jobs, those with jobs are being stretch to the limit, and the more social people have lost almost everything that makes them happy.)

Stay positive @kristaok, i have high hopes that this whole thing has good effects too. People are becoming more aware of their close communities and are being more considerate to others, like vulnerable populations, theyre learning good hygene and new skills out of boredom. We'll come out of this with more artists and a new appreciation for our current society. Businesses are also developing infrastructure to work from home at a rate faster than before. 

Don't let this new world break you. Much love. Warm tea. 

 

[Guest kristaok]

Thank you all, I admit... I know I shouldn't be complaining or be depressed at all... It's just been super hard, I mean it was hard before this... but this has really made it worse. The panic attacks were getting bad there for a few days, it was scary... plus it's not like I could go to the hospital and get on meds now with this coronavirus. I think I am just worrying way too much. 

I definitely do need to work on my sleep, it got to where I was sleeping during the day and staying up at night, so bad I couldn't think right. Now I am just sort of getting back into a normal routine, I am still not in the clear, I still have issues sleeping at night and anxiety, but I am making progress. 

 

Thanks all!

 

PS. @Hotzn - You sound a lot like me, when I see an insect or animal in need I try my best to help them. I appreciate you helping that Bee.

and

@MarrowStone I am sorry you've battled depression your whole life, same here... it sucks really bad... sometimes I feel all alone, then I have to remind myself, there's sadly others out there battling it too.  

Edited March 30, 2020 by kristaok

[Guest Jeffery Simpson]

Hey @kristaok,

Sorry to hear that you're having a hard time of things. 

I certainly know what it's like to feel anxious, to worry about things and to let those worries become bigger than the problems. We like being able to have problems we can solve right away like "I'm cold" or "There's a wolf after me" which give us a clear path forward. This social isolation which is the clear path forward, unfortunately leaves us with a lot more time to dwell on the negatives and the worries than say running away from a wolf.

If you can please reach out to someone in your area who deals with depression, and may have some tips for you. If you're not sure who that might be either DM myself or the @Admin account and we'll see what we can find in your area for you.

Also never feel bad about complaining. We're here to listen and talk as a community and while this is hard on everyone there's people here who love talking with you on the forums and we all just want the best for everyone.

Best.

[Guest kristaok]

@Jeffery Simpson Thank you, I appreciate this.

I appreciate ya'll, everyone here on the Forums, It makes me wanna cry but in a happy way. I can work on this and move forward, I have to realize I'm not the only one struggling. Panic Attacks make me feel like I am dying, they scare me, but they cannot kill me. I'm so lucky to be alive, I can't complain while others have it worse. I will work harder on myself everyone. I recently got into aromatherapy things to help my panic attacks and vertigo, it seems it's helping me some. And I am trying to readjust my sleeping schedule, I can't let myself have insomnia that causes me to stay awake all day. This is going to pass. It will get better everyone. I hope everyone is doing good themselves. I also hope Hinterland is doing good through this. 

 

❤️

[manolitode]

I'd like to add a couple of things to @MarrowStone's otherwise eminent advice. You will benefit from a daily exercise routine. A 10 minute daily walk is way better than none. You may increase the length of your daily walking routine at your own pace, it's hard to overdo it 😊 Second, don't forget the intense workout 2-3 times a week, you want the good neurotransmitters that your body provides from physical exhaustion. Also, eating healthy is beneficial obviously but dieting and depression isn't the best combination. Treat yourself with an occasional unhealthy snack every now and then. Try to avoid alcohol as long as you're suffering from panic attacks. 

Thank you for sharing the load and don't forget to share your feelings with someone you love

[Guest kristaok]

Thank you guys. I need to try to walk, but sadly with my asthma I was born with I walk my breathing gets bad and instantly anxiety that says your dying. That scares me so bad. I know I need to control it though. Like even a head ping or anything I think I'm dying. So imagine breathing issues.  

I need to work on this I know

[Coreopsis]

I know I'm late in posting this, but I'm going to anyway.  I just saw the thread.  I hope you're doing better.  March and April were a terrible time for me too.  The anxiety was overwhelming but i was lucky enough to have a trusted friend to talk to.  I hope you do too.  Take good care of yourself. All the best to you all.  

[singapore]

How is everyone doing now?

[BlinkMoFried]

On 9/30/2020 at 3:58 AM, singapore said:

How is everyone doing now?

I'm fine here, coffee is up and will do cleaning backyard later. How about you?